Jacki
Bubis
Writing
for Radio-Assignment 1
Leaving
Home
“Procrastination
Station”
I’m
running late before I get out of bed in the morning. I have deemed myself, “Queen
of the Snooze Button.” All hail. Even when I try to trick myself into being on
time, like when I set my alarm fifteen minutes before usual, I still am walking
out the door late—but waking up late isn’t the only participant in my
procrastination to leaving my driveway. I move like a turtle, literally.
Sometimes, I’m too tired to walk to the bathroom, so I crawl to it. It takes
twice as long and most often I stop halfway to cuddle with my dog. Why do I do
this? I don’t know, because I’m completely aware that I’m doing it. This
morning, instead of starting my breakfast, I organized the cups in my cupboard
according to size. It took me ten minutes to fill one of those cups with the
coffee that I made after my (fung-shway) attack.
Home
is never a place I want to leave; it’s a place I have to leave—and let me tell
you, I only leave because I have to. I find myself weighing my options
every morning: go to work or stay home and fall behind. Go to the store, or eat
the baking soda in the back of the fridge. Make the drive to visit my
boyfriend, or die alone. Sometimes, I’m willing to take the second option, but
nine times out of ten, I end up leaving home to start my day—and as I leave, I
count the hours until I’m be back.
Wow! That was quite vivid. I found it very funny, and detailed. I'm not sure how true the whole story is, but if it is than I feel bad for you. I really enjoyed reading it. All hail Queen of the Snooze Button!
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